Opening Statement



Monday, 27 August 2018

Oh Cannabis: Intro -Karma Cup 2018!



Late August can only mean one thing for me -it's time to judge the Karma Cup again! So here I am, out at my retirement retreat, our trailer site deep in the woods of Land o' Lakes, Ontario. Communing with nature. Kayaking on Lake Mississaganon. And smoking a helluva lotta weed!

I tripped back into Toronto last weekend to pick up my doctor's bag of over 130 samples of Karma Cup bud, shatter, extracts, concentrates, distillates, terpenes, CBD's, vape pens, pre rolls and topicals. Whoa! It's a stoner's wet dream deluxe! Comes in a big, black bag, with a golden Karma Cup logo on the side. Smelling as dank as can be.

This is my second year judging the cup. With my karma, something quite bizarre always happens, when I go to pick it up. But then, against all odds, it somehow miraculously becomes a non-event. Consider:

Last year I got into a big argument with an angry cop ticketing my car. While I'm holding this giant doctor's bag of dank weed. Expressing my outspoken opinion on Toronto parking enforcement matters for all and sundry, in no uncertain terms. 

Eh?!? Yes! You could smell the fucking weed a mile away!



But some of the 32 buds to be tested!

Meanwhile, "Toronto's Finest" is quite rightly scratching his head. Totally befuckled and bewildered. But fortunately sober second thought somehow makes me shut up, where common sense otherwise fails. 

I take the ticket. Drive off quick. But not too quick. Saving the day. Whew!

This year I thought it would be much wiser to just take the subway. In Toronto, after all, it is supposed to be the "better way". 

So, I'm boarding the train, during rush hour, carrying my giant bag of weed. The platform is packed tight. Always the gentleman, I step back to let a young mother pushing a baby carriage enter first. Then, of course, the huge sliding doors crash closed smack tight on my Karma Cup bag, squeezing it so hard, I thought for sure it would burst wide open. Tossing buds, shatter and whatnot all over the subway platform and train floor!

Luckily, a kindly, little, old lady bringing up the rear, noticed my plight. With a well placed shoulder butt, she knocked my bag safely in after me, through the doors slamming madly back and forth. Somehow against all odds, saving my day!

Well, it just goes to show! They say we Canucks are extremely polite. How true! Of course, being a grey haired, cranky old white guy probably doesn't hurt one's chances of getting a totally crazy break either, even in our folly. 



A few of the 23 medibles ...

Yup! Firstly, one morn one wakes up with gray hair. Overnight, you go from being called "Hey you!" to "Yes Sir!", for some inexplicable reason. Then these kinda Karma Cup "senior moments" increasingly occur more and more and more often. Yet everything somehow works out swell. But I digress .......

So, you might well ask; is there a downside to the Karma Cup? Yes, I suppose so. It costs about $700, with the "early bird special", to register and apply. 

But the good news is that it's a fabulous deal! Consider the Karma Cup as a "blind test taste". You get to sample all the latest, greatest ways to toke, ingest or otherwise do weed, with even a few tasters left over to keep one smiling throughout the long, cold, Canadian winter ahead.

Anyway, here I am now, a happy man safely back in my trailer park, in the woods by the lake! Everything in my big, black doctor's bag needs to be very carefully tested by September 7th. And marked between 1 to 9, according to taste, smell, medicinal effect, strength, visual appeal, texture, residue, smoothness, flush/ burn, ease of dosing, enjoyment etc. etc. etc. ....



Important work! Someones got to do it! I figure the best two decisions I made in life where -Number 1: to get into teaching, and Number 2: to get out of teaching. Plus, let's face it; knowing how to mark things well, sure can come in handy, at times like this. And that I end up grading weed, rather than term papers, notebooks and tests in my August years? Pretty ironic eh? Nope, I don't have to get up early in the morning and go to high school high to teach a bunch of stoners anymore either. No way! 

Gotta admit it. That's just plain, old fashioned good karma, pure and simple! Highly recommended! Nice work if you can get it!

Eh? But I'm still teaching stoners ....? Hmmmm .... Well, maybe learning a thing or two from them too .... 

Is there life after teaching? In my humble opinion, Cannabis Activism and judging the Karma Cup is definitely the way to go! 

In my next few blogs, I'll provide a review of the Karma Cup weekend  Also the winning results, along with my own judging notes notes on the grading process. 

Stay tuned! The big Karma Cup weekend of festivities comes to Toronto September 8th and 9th! With lotsa high times ahead!



LINKS

Karma Cup 2018 Review @ Here!

Karma Cup 2018 Judge's Notes @ Here!

Karma Cup 2017 Review @ Here!


Karma Cup 2016 Review @ Here!


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